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Confidence

from Facepalm by Bishopston Hardware

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lyrics

I wonder if my memory serves me right
When I look back.
Confident, competent;
Can that really be how I began?
Taught in school that we were the chosen ones;
Cream of the crop.
World at our feet,
Captains of industry,
Ready to rise to the top.
With hindsight we were conned.
The world we were supposed to lead
Is the world that is destroying me.
At least I get the irony.

Hard to say if all those expectations
Mean that I now fear the worst in every situation,
Whatever the evidence.
Some times bad things come to pass
But in my head the sense of dread
Engulfs my waning common sense
And I catastrophise.
Must be perfect before I can criticise.
Can't look you in the eyes and ask you to do better,
'Cos I'm always doing worse.
Rad Bobbo knows that this is folly,
But Bad Robbo's on a jolly with my self-esteem
And I don't know when they'll be home.

Elegy for former me.
I have to hope that I can be
A better version of this person.
Imagining how life could be.
I have to hope that I can me
A better version of this person.

credits

from Facepalm, released November 11, 2023

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Beigelord Bristol, UK

Home-recorded learner guitar from the only food group that matters.

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